I've been thinking a lot lately about miracles and how they pertain to Tommy. Recently the Lord has opened my eyes to a particular passage, one I had heard countless times and never applied to Tommy's situation. John 9: 2-5 tells the story of the man born blind. Jesus' disciples ask him whose sin caused his blindness, the man's or his parents. Jesus, of course, tells them it happened so that people might see the glory of God.
As I said I have heard this scripture many times before but never attempted to view it concerning Tommy.
While in the fog of trying to accept and adjust to the reality of Tommy, I sometimes felt as if my in-laws thought Tommy wasn't acceptable or good enough without a miraculous healing. I know they didn't feel that way, but almost immediately they started praying for and talking about how he was going to have a miracle. I'm all for miracles and as a card-carrying Catholic, fully believe in many from the Dancing Sun at Fatima; to the waters of Lourdes; to Padre Pio's many miraculous doings. Not to mention the one I most often referenced to assure people I believed in miracles, transubstantiation of bread and wine into the Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity of Christ.
But in that fog I couldn't quite voice my feeling that perhaps God had a greater purpose in Tommy's having been born the way he was. I felt like my in-laws and I were talking past each other and my tongue kept betraying my argument in its inability to voice accurately what I felt in my head and heart.
I realize that in the very story I mentioned Jesus cures the blind man via a miracle, so perhaps it doesn't best describe how I felt then, but I think it does. I also heard that I was limiting God, which aggravated me because God created everything "Seen and unseen," so how was me saying maybe he doesn't want to heal Tommy limiting him. He called a universe into being merely by thinking it. He has no limits, again it was as if my tongue couldn't articulate the argument I had, which I felt and still feel was theologically sound. Which is to say my argument was at the time, if God chooses to heal him I am just fine and dandy with that, but if he doesn't I am ok with that too.
In the last several months as I get Tommy ready for bed it has become part of our ritual to say a handful of prayers: the Our Father, Hail Mary and Glory Be start us off. We follow those with prayers to St. Michael, Tommy's guardian angels, and our big finish is a prayer to Our Lady of Lourdes and one to St. Rita.
If you don't know St. Rita, she is the patroness of the impossible. Tommy and I ask her to pray for Tommy's miracle as fervently as she can. Sometimes I even include a prayer to John Paul the Great, since I figure he probably understood a lot of what Tommy goes through, being trapped inside your own body.
In Hebrews 11:1 we are told that "Faith is the realization of what is hoped for and evidence of things not seen." I believe Tommy has that faith. I know I do. I believe God can heal Tommy, I just wonder if it is to His purposes to do so. In my own prayers at night I routinely ask God to see Tommy even if just once, even if it's only a dream, through His perfect eyes.
During a trip to our local healing room, one of the guys had a bit of a vision or prophecy for me. He told me that he saw Tommy as my ministry in a way that he could see me talking to a room full of folks and saying you think your kids are hard cases let me tell you about mine. I often wonder if that was God's way of saying "be ready when I do my work so you can carry the message." Or is it the other way, insofar as Tommy's story is a story of survival all it's own with or without miraculous trappings.
Knowing the odds Tommy has already overcome and that he continues to overcome, make me so proud of him. Sometimes I see Matty moving and doing things so effortlessly that his big brother still struggles with after three and a half years and I almost get mad at him. Sometimes I look at Tommy and wonder what I ever did to deserve him, because I am unworthy. I know that God has entrusted Traci and I with one of the best pieces of his work and I have yet to understand why. I just pray for the strength to be what he needs me to be. And I pray for the understanding of what God needs me to be, for my family.
Over the winter we prayed at Mass for a local nun to be healed. There was a note from her convent in the bulletin this weekend, saying she didn't get the miracle healing. The nuns noted sometimes when we pray we don't get the miracle we want, but we always get the miracle we need.
That's the thing we don't always understand, God but he knows better than we do. Hard knowledge to swallow sometimes. Almost as hard, if not harder, is that just because we get told "No" doesn't mean God didn't answer our prayer.
Monday, February 28, 2011
Thursday, February 24, 2011
America's Chihuahua in Chief.....
On April 9, 1986, Ronald Reagan called Moammar Qaddafi, "The Mad Dog of the Middle East". Yesterday, his successor couldn't even be bothered to name the man accused of strafing his own citizens with the military assets of their own country. Yet Barack Obama always tries to push some sort of connection to Reagan. It makes me want to vomit every time I hear someone bring those two names up in the same breath.
President Reagan believed very strongly in peace. Peace through strength. He didn't feel the need to go pick a fight with anyone, but we would damn sure be ready should someone pick one with us. Obama on the other hand has spent his time in office, apologizing for America and continually weakening us at home and abroad.
As it is it was nine days, nine, seriously nine days before Obama could even be bothered to mention that there was something afoot in Libya. His handlers claim there were some scheduling conflicts..... WHAT!!!! You are the President of the United States, when the world is on fire it behooves you to clear some time from your schedule to address it Mr. President. Could be worse it was what three weeks before he acknowledged the oil spill last summer.
Seems when his buddies/donors are in trouble he sure has lots of scheduling conflicts preventing him from addressing those issues. Remember the vitriol hurled at George W. Bush for not wanting to terrify a group of third graders by running out of the room on 9/11. Where are those voices decrying Obama's lack of mentioning Libya.
The greatest fighting force in the world has not been sent to a forward area to project our force. We could easily put a carrier group in the Mediterranean Sea and also put some assets near the Persian Gulf. Yet, we haven't done any of that.
The Middle East is on fire from our allies to our enemies and we are sitting on our hands and hoping that nice things happen....really...We could with just a little effort likely turn what could potentially be a bad situation into a positive and create stability and democratic ideals in the region.
Yet we sit on our hands and weakly condemn violent force used by a man who was once the world's number one terrorist. A man who was responsible for ordering the bombing of the La Belle Disco in 1986; The Pan Am Lockerbie bombing in 1988. These two events killed nearly 300 people and injured almost as many.
I have said since he was elected that Obama was a second term for Jimmy Carter, but that isn't even a strong enough criticism. Carter was woefully inept to be sure, but I don't think he was trying to weaken the US intentionally, he was just overwhelmed by the job. Obama's foreign policy decisions make Carter look almost hawkish by comparison.
Watching the election results in 2008 as it became clear Obama was going to win I became very sad for the US. I wondered how bad things would get during what I tried to assure myself would be a single term. Now we are getting our answer.
Here's looking forward to the next Reagan, whoever he (or she) will be. Check out this Gallup Poll showing how bad Obama's doing across the country, looks like as of right now 2012 will be a Republican Landslide.
President Reagan believed very strongly in peace. Peace through strength. He didn't feel the need to go pick a fight with anyone, but we would damn sure be ready should someone pick one with us. Obama on the other hand has spent his time in office, apologizing for America and continually weakening us at home and abroad.
As it is it was nine days, nine, seriously nine days before Obama could even be bothered to mention that there was something afoot in Libya. His handlers claim there were some scheduling conflicts..... WHAT!!!! You are the President of the United States, when the world is on fire it behooves you to clear some time from your schedule to address it Mr. President. Could be worse it was what three weeks before he acknowledged the oil spill last summer.
Seems when his buddies/donors are in trouble he sure has lots of scheduling conflicts preventing him from addressing those issues. Remember the vitriol hurled at George W. Bush for not wanting to terrify a group of third graders by running out of the room on 9/11. Where are those voices decrying Obama's lack of mentioning Libya.
The greatest fighting force in the world has not been sent to a forward area to project our force. We could easily put a carrier group in the Mediterranean Sea and also put some assets near the Persian Gulf. Yet, we haven't done any of that.
The Middle East is on fire from our allies to our enemies and we are sitting on our hands and hoping that nice things happen....really...We could with just a little effort likely turn what could potentially be a bad situation into a positive and create stability and democratic ideals in the region.
Yet we sit on our hands and weakly condemn violent force used by a man who was once the world's number one terrorist. A man who was responsible for ordering the bombing of the La Belle Disco in 1986; The Pan Am Lockerbie bombing in 1988. These two events killed nearly 300 people and injured almost as many.
I have said since he was elected that Obama was a second term for Jimmy Carter, but that isn't even a strong enough criticism. Carter was woefully inept to be sure, but I don't think he was trying to weaken the US intentionally, he was just overwhelmed by the job. Obama's foreign policy decisions make Carter look almost hawkish by comparison.
Watching the election results in 2008 as it became clear Obama was going to win I became very sad for the US. I wondered how bad things would get during what I tried to assure myself would be a single term. Now we are getting our answer.
Here's looking forward to the next Reagan, whoever he (or she) will be. Check out this Gallup Poll showing how bad Obama's doing across the country, looks like as of right now 2012 will be a Republican Landslide.
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Web Links Wednesday
Hello all, well it's another Hump Day....You know what that means here at the Musings...it's time for some Web Links.....
Edited to add one more link:
President Obama's HHS Dept. rolled back Conscience regulations for pharmacists and docs, which means some could be forced to violate their moral/religious principles....Catholic Hospitals supposedly still have their same protections in place......
- A couple of great posts on the Canon of Scripture from my friend Joe over at Shameless Popery....ok he's not my friend but he has commented on my blog before and his stuff blows my mind...someday I hope to be this knowledgeable in my faith.....He deals with which Canon(s) might be "correct" and whether Jesus quoted or otherwise used them....
- Pope Benedict's Lenten message released on the Feast Day of the Chair of St. Peter.....
- Reaganite Republican has been busy with loads of info on the happenings in Libya....plus some other things...
- Here's a lot of info from the Middle East straight from the horse's mouth... Al Jazeera is one of the best news organizations around.....plus they are right in the middle of it all....
- A little post President's Day info on a recent poll from Michelle Malkin on the Greatest Presidents
- The winner of that Poll's library......
- The wikipedia page of one of my favorite EWTN hosts. Fr. Benedict Groeschel, an amazing man with a heck of a story, he nearly died in a 2004 accident, in fact he had no signs of life for 20 minutes at one point and he hosts Sunday Night Live on EWTN plus he is an amazing author....and I won't lie reminds me a bit of my own Papaw....makes me a little homesick every time I see him...
Edited to add one more link:
President Obama's HHS Dept. rolled back Conscience regulations for pharmacists and docs, which means some could be forced to violate their moral/religious principles....Catholic Hospitals supposedly still have their same protections in place......
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