Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Am I Really Ready for this?

So here we are three short days from D-Day. While I am super excited to have a son, someone to carry the Morris and Jacobson lines further into history, I gotta admit I am terrified as well. I can barely take care of the wife and myself, how on Earth will I take care of Tommy as well. Everyone says I will be a good father, but can anyone really know. Certainly I had a great example, but how will I apply those lessons to shaping this little life. Tommy will spend his first several years thinking his dad -and mom hopefully- are some sort of superhuman beings, lofty expectations, no.

Every time I think of my son I think of all these great and wonderful things I hope he will accomplish, but the flip side... I guess Robin Williams said it best in his Night at the Met album/stand up special. "You have this dream of him standing at a podium and saying I would like to thank the Nobel Academy, but you have another dream where he is saying 'do you want fries with that.'"

On a completely impractical and totally useless tangent, how on earth do I help Tommy pick out the proper teams to root for. I mean as a 49er fan from the days of Montana-Rice to the days of Smith-Gore, how do I teach Tommy to root for the scarlet and gold and not fall into his mother's sway and become a Vikings fan. On a more frightening note what if he fails to listen to any good logic from either side of the family and becomes a Seahawks fan or something. And that's just pro football I don't know what I will do if the kid doesn't like Notre Dame. I would probably tolerate a little sports bigamy in terms of collegiate athletics because let's face I root for no less than three NCAA teams actively.

Here's hoping if nothing else Tommy has his dad's sense of excited participation in sports, may he not suffer from his father's lackluster participation, however.

Ultimately I guess I really just hope Tommy and I have a relationship resembling the one I have with my dad. We have always been best buds, really, hunting partners, video game opponents, friends. I am sure every expectant father suffers from the same can I do this sort of fears I am feeling right now, it is just absolutely terrifying to think that any day now, I will literally have a mouth to feed and a human being to care for that is totally dependent on his mother and I.

The beautiful wife I don't worry about she was born to be a mother and besides Lord knows in the 22 months of our wedded bliss I have given her lots of practice.

Every time I put my hand on my wife's belly and feel my little bruiser kicking and bouncing up a storm in there I feel simultaneously overjoyed and scared, but I gotta admit it is one of the best feelings I have ever had in my life.

Here's to you Thomas Christopher. Feel free to come out and enjoy the world now, big boy.